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Coronavirus 'emergency'? Oregon
police ask people to stop calling 911
because they ran out of toilet paper

Original Article

Posted By: NorthernDog, 3/15/2020 11:14:25 PM

A police department in Oregon is urging people that if they’ve run out of toilet paper, it’s not worth calling 911. The Newport Police Department posted the surprising message on its Facebook page as shoppers across the country have flocked to supermarkets to stock up on supplies amid the coronavirus pandemic that has put much of the world on edge. “It’s hard to believe that we even have to post this. Do not call 9-1-1 just because you ran out of toilet paper. You will survive without our assistance,” NPD wrote. (Facebook) The department then offered numerous alternatives if people


Most people in Oregon should have a pack of Zig Zag rolling paper nearby.

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Reply 1 - Posted by: Newtsche 3/15/2020 11:20:14 PM (No. 347623)
OP for the win :-)
17 people like this.

Reply 2 - Posted by: Deepthinker 3/15/2020 11:27:23 PM (No. 347627)
I am coming to the conclusion that this is an opportunity to take advantage of one of those "offers" I keep getting from the New York Times. A large volume of toilet paper substitute with home delivery!
9 people like this.

Reply 3 - Posted by: zzzghy 3/15/2020 11:29:59 PM (No. 347628)
Agree with #2. Use it and send it back.
7 people like this.

Reply 4 - Posted by: Connor 3/16/2020 1:05:43 AM (No. 347646)
Since running out of toilet paper has everyone worried can't they step up production? Seems like that would calm things down a bit.
2 people like this.

Reply 5 - Posted by: DVC 3/16/2020 1:50:40 AM (No. 347656)
#4, probably zero need to increase production, just ship more from the warehouses. Idiots will eventually be up to their eyeballs in the stuff and stop it.
4 people like this.

Reply 6 - Posted by: coyote 3/16/2020 4:02:52 AM (No. 347681)
Hey, go outside and rake some leaves, they might be useful for the task at hand.
1 person likes this.

Reply 7 - Posted by: Bill O Rights 3/16/2020 4:47:40 AM (No. 347691)
Oregonians are true believers in the nanny state so I'm not surprised. However they also believe in the green deal so you can't increase production. The obvious solution is to create an Oregon Toilet Paper Commission to spend millions to study the issue and implement controls.
2 people like this.

Reply 8 - Posted by: 4Justice 3/16/2020 5:00:25 AM (No. 347694)
Let's send all our leaves and old corn cobs to Oregon with a few laminated pamphlets with history and instructions. We can let them know that this is what they can look forward to once we go back to nature as the leftists want us to do. Say it will slow down climate change too!
1 person likes this.

Reply 9 - Posted by: Jeninmo 3/16/2020 5:53:52 AM (No. 347707)
Just imagine the waste water/sewer conditions after all this toilet paper and non-flushables wreak their havoc.
2 people like this.

Reply 10 - Posted by: DCGIRL 3/16/2020 6:50:58 AM (No. 347734)
No sympathy here for this nanny state. Rough it!!!
1 person likes this.

Reply 11 - Posted by: hershey 3/16/2020 7:27:38 AM (No. 347751)
Guess they never heard of using napkins..ooops, now there will be a 'run' on napkins in Oregon... lol
0 people like this.

Reply 12 - Posted by: jeffkinnh 3/16/2020 8:02:52 AM (No. 347785)
We don't have a "shortage" of paper products. We have a panicked change in purchasing, a change in the demand. Stores are getting more in and panicked people are snatching it up. At some point, the hoarders will have "enough" and the supply chain will level out. Meanwhile, people have been cleaning babies with wet washcloths forever. Then they wash the washcloths. The old way still works and for adults as well, it's just not as convenient. Some people are amazingly useless in a challenging environment.
4 people like this.

Reply 13 - Posted by: tom7 3/16/2020 8:27:47 AM (No. 347804)
Liberals carry infantilism to the point of insanity.
6 people like this.

Reply 14 - Posted by: cheeflo 3/16/2020 7:29:36 PM (No. 348398)
I can’t begin to understand how people would do this. I’ll bet there are a lot of weird calls to 911 all over the country. I do remember during my 1970s party monster period, calling information (411) to find out what day it was. After a “nap” of undetermined length, I wasn’t sure if it was 7 o’clock on Sunday night or Monday morning. I had to be at work by 9am Monday and I was miles away from home. After posing the question, there was a short silence on the line and then the operator told me it was Sunday night. I made it to work. I’ll bet she still tells that story.
0 people like this.

Reply 15 - Posted by: 49 Ford 3/17/2020 3:49:59 AM (No. 348607)
I was going to jokingly suggest that # 7 run for governor up there. But then I stopped myself when I realized that the poor guy or gal might win.
0 people like this.

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