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Fights, Thefts, Arguments as Toilet
Paper Mania Wipes Across Globe

Original Article

Posted By: Imright, 3/13/2020 10:12:57 PM

Society is seemingly melting down all around us, and there’s a run on toilet paper. Seriously. Why? Has toilet paper production been cut? No. Are we running out of trees? Nope. Coronavirus is largely a respiratory ailment. But that hasn’t stopped a collective freakout over the bare necessity of having clean bottoms. This morning, a man confronted an ABC 13 news crew outside an H-E-B store in Texas. Reporter Miya Shay was in the midst of a report when the man approached and shouted, “It’s your fault that people are freaking out here.”(Tweet/Video)

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Reply 1 - Posted by: droopydog 3/13/2020 10:22:18 PM (No. 345743)
It's a fad, a craze, a happening. People will want to discuss an relive their TP escapades for decades to come. Remember the great toilet paper panic of 2020? Yeah, I punched a dude at Walmart!
20 people like this.

Reply 2 - Posted by: padiva 3/13/2020 10:24:27 PM (No. 345745)
I've been hoarding TP for 5 years. It started during the BO administration. I had fears that BO would destroy the economy, declare martial law and suspend elections. BO so wanted to be king.
16 people like this.

Reply 3 - Posted by: LadyHen 3/13/2020 10:47:12 PM (No. 345751)
fta: "I don’t know that we’re going to make it through this,” he said. “But now that I’ve got my stock of toilet paper, my family will be safe. "When we go to the barter system, which will be very shortly, in my opinion, I think that my toilet paper is going to be able to be traded for alcohol, which I think is more important,” he added. He didn’t appear to be joking." What kind of alien breeding program produces freaks like this? While we might not like to think on it, humans ahem.. went for thousands of years without toilet paper.
21 people like this.

Reply 4 - Posted by: LC Chihuahua 3/13/2020 10:58:15 PM (No. 345753)
The only way it makes sense is a lot of people are thinking they are going to be cooped up at home for over two weeks. Well, the schools are closed which means the children are at home. If the children are young enough, one of the parents will have to stay at home.
11 people like this.

Reply 5 - Posted by: JrSample 3/13/2020 11:03:33 PM (No. 345755)
I have plenty of ammunition and a stock of MREs. Oh, each MRE has a toilet paper packet in it, along with chiclets, tabasco sauce, etc. I don't understand the TP fixation. First, you have to think about eating, then about cr@99ing.
17 people like this.

Reply 6 - Posted by: Dodge Boy 3/13/2020 11:08:08 PM (No. 345756)
I dunno. For me, the top three priorities continue to be bullets, whiskey, and Cubs Baseball (except now I have to wait another 4 weeks for the regular season to start). Besides, we have plenty of newspaper in the trailer normally used for camp fire starting in case the TP supply runs out. Even the Mexican drug cartels are getting ancy. I see ICE has intercepted pallets of TP being floated across the Rio Grande for Mexico.
9 people like this.

Reply 7 - Posted by: greggojo 3/13/2020 11:14:13 PM (No. 345758)
I honestly do not understand this. Yes, you need a little more tp if you are staying at home for two weeks, but hoarding? I don't get it. The two women in the first video had grabbed the store's entire supply of TP and piled it into their cart, and then got into a physical altercation when another customer wanted just one of the packages. ???????
15 people like this.

Reply 8 - Posted by: Rumblehog 3/13/2020 11:16:21 PM (No. 345759)
Whoever is sitting on all the toilet paper should start selling it on the black, er, brown market soon. s/o
16 people like this.

Reply 9 - Posted by: Heraclitus 3/13/2020 11:50:28 PM (No. 345766)
You all have me laughing so hard I can't see. ok. ahem. Remember when Cheryl Crow joined by some other environmental wackos, told us we needed to reduce tp usage to one square per "elimination? I'm thinking they're hoarding to, too.
11 people like this.

Reply 10 - Posted by: Muncsdad 3/13/2020 11:53:00 PM (No. 345768)
I agree with the man at HEB that it IS the media’s fault that this hysteria has gripped the nation. That and the sad fact that the US is now inhabited by whimpering crybabies and wussies.
23 people like this.

Reply 11 - Posted by: JediJerry 3/13/2020 11:59:29 PM (No. 345769)
Remember Y2K? At this point after everyone has hoarded it. As soon as stores are restocked there should be lots available on the now baren shelves. I can wait.
14 people like this.

Reply 12 - Posted by: ragu 3/14/2020 12:15:37 AM (No. 345776)
As stated before...You can't fix stupid!
14 people like this.

Reply 13 - Posted by: tacocat 3/14/2020 12:27:22 AM (No. 345780)
People are lame; otherwise they wouldn't be doing this.
11 people like this.

Reply 14 - Posted by: ColonialAmerican1623 3/14/2020 1:17:14 AM (No. 345784)
You are witnessing mass hysteria. A friend really needed some for their house and had a real problem finding any. Sent them to one last place and they found some at a store that had empty TP boxes all over the floor. It was selling as fast as it arrived. It's like hurricane supplies disappearing here. I talked one young woman into buying Pedialyte and told her if she got really sick, that's what she needed. Schools are closing along with theme parks. This is a financial disaster. Did China release chemical warfare?
10 people like this.

Reply 15 - Posted by: DVC 3/14/2020 1:21:32 AM (No. 345786)
Stupid as heck.
8 people like this.

Reply 16 - Posted by: Grounded 3/14/2020 1:35:41 AM (No. 345794)
The morons are hoarding all kinds of stuff. Hand soap. Hand sanitizers. Potatoes? Bananas. I told the asst. manager at Kroger today they ought to be charging ten bucks per bottle for hand soap and sanitizer. Any time there is an event in some locale, the hoteliers aren't bashful about charging double and triple the normal room rates. Just go to Austin, TX, during SxSW and try to find a room for the usual rate. Ain't happening.
8 people like this.

Reply 17 - Posted by: JimBob 3/14/2020 1:54:45 AM (No. 345802)
.... and that headline writer thought they were SO cute when the worked the word 'wipes' into the title. .... what a Jackass!
6 people like this.

Reply 18 - Posted by: konocti95 3/14/2020 2:55:40 AM (No. 345819)
My rolls last a month or more. I'm on a keto diet (high protein and fat, low carbs). Very low residue, one trip to the loo every couple of days and everything comes out pretty clean. I hope this isn't TMI.
5 people like this.

Reply 19 - Posted by: DVC 3/14/2020 3:19:43 AM (No. 345822)
Lunacy in the TP aisle. Not the first time this insanity has hit. I was an engineering student in '73, up to my eyeballs in getting ready to graduate at the end of the year. I don't even remember that lunatic event, I was studying until midnight most nights, and in class all day, most days. A 15 hour workload in engineering doesn't leave a lot of free time besides the summer.
5 people like this.

Reply 20 - Posted by: KatieJo 3/14/2020 4:54:44 AM (No. 345843)
I have never seen anything like this, it's crazy. Was doing my weekly shopping at Walmart, managed to grab the last package of my favorite brand. There was still some off-brand TP there, but I was stunned. I got a cal from the neighbor yesterday who was out shopping wondering why all the TP is gone. I thought then that maybe I should have grabbed an extra package or two. Went online, Amazon is virtually OUT of toilet paper, Hy-Vee, Menards, everyone is out of toilet paper. I have to believe that most of these people have been listening to the MSM talking about how people are stocking up on TP and have decided to follow suite. It was never on my list of critical apocalyptic supplies. Now normal people who are not panicking will have to do without TP. I also wonder if there was someone behind this?.....
8 people like this.

Reply 21 - Posted by: Daisymay 3/14/2020 5:07:38 AM (No. 345847)
I went to grocery shop on Thursday. Just to buy what I needed, nothing just to stash for the next few weeks. Hubby needed four gallons of Bleach to use outside and there was a sign "only Two per customer". He brought home Two and said they were the LAST Two in the store. Paper Napkins were all sold out. Jeesh! Of course T. Paper shelves were empty. I have a pretty good supply as I buy it when it's on Sale, but still, I wouldn't fill my cart with it! People are going nut!
7 people like this.

Reply 22 - Posted by: franq 3/14/2020 7:26:48 AM (No. 345892)
You know what the worst part is? The Kung Flu will be under control when the media SAYS it's under control. Till then, they foment panic.
3 people like this.

Reply 23 - Posted by: M-79 3/14/2020 7:51:51 AM (No. 345900)
Went shopping yesterday and was surprised to see the shelves 50% empty and the store looked like Christmas Eve with all the shoppers. I told my wife, "Take a look at the shelves. This is what the stores will look like when the Dems implement the Green New Deal/" Some Milenniels gave me a dirty look so I told them, "Hey Caronavirus isn't so bad, I heard it was gluten free!" They have no sense of humor.
8 people like this.

Reply 24 - Posted by: Paperpuncher 3/14/2020 8:52:31 AM (No. 345959)
This would indicate to me that due to the Corona Virus people suddenly have to poop more than normal and they are taking precautionary steps. Sears Robuck catalogs used to be what we would use. In today's market we could use newspaper and god knows there is enough junk mail around to supply the world. Get busy living!
2 people like this.

Reply 25 - Posted by: oldmagnolia 3/14/2020 9:35:04 AM (No. 345999)
#7 yesterday at Publix for the first time I saw one policeman at the door and one walking the aisles expecting TP fights.
1 person likes this.

Reply 26 - Posted by: judy 3/14/2020 11:00:49 AM (No. 346072)
Somebody got confused...they said keep your hands clean & they thought it was keep your behinds clean.
0 people like this.

Reply 27 - Posted by: Rubinski 3/14/2020 11:03:34 AM (No. 346075)
There will not be a shortage of toilet paper in the US. It’s almost all made in North America. I looked it up and it mostly comes from the SE US, NW US and Canada, with some coming from South America. There is no need to have more than a 3 month supply in your house. If you need to make sure you are stocked up on anything, make sure you have a 90 day supply of any generic prescription medication you take. That likely IS made in China.
0 people like this.

Reply 28 - Posted by: fayebeck 3/14/2020 11:11:09 AM (No. 346092)
Think sensible and patriotic Americans will never accept socialism? Think American's will come together to fight the barbarians? I agree with Tom Sowell. America will surrender if two nukes are detonated in the country. We will accept socialism if a left wing nut promises that each person will receive equal rolls of Charmin. This man made panic will pass and then the wait for the next one.
0 people like this.

Reply 29 - Posted by: Fred1933 3/14/2020 12:31:12 PM (No. 346174)
Fear beats reason anytime. Old brain versus new brain. It is hard for reason to overcome the sense of fear and panic.
0 people like this.

Reply 30 - Posted by: ROLFNader 3/14/2020 12:59:35 PM (No. 346210)
Same as other posters, I hoarded ammo, dried food, canned food, etc . But one thing that never crossed nor will it ever cross my mind is bungfodder.
0 people like this.

Reply 31 - Posted by: msjena 3/14/2020 3:22:45 PM (No. 346315)
My local grocery store had a run on Grey Poupon mustard. Seriously, they were sold out! Other varieties were available.
0 people like this.

Reply 32 - Posted by: Winstonian 3/14/2020 4:00:40 PM (No. 346340)
I live in Southeast Texas. The Whole Foods around the corner from my house has relabeled fresh non-GMO, gluten free Spinach salad leaves as organic toilet paper.
1 person likes this.

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