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‘Perineum sunning’ is latest insanity
wellness influencers swear by

Original Article

Posted By: Ribicon, 11/27/2019 11:45:32 AM

They’re soaking up some rays where the sun don’t shine. The hottest trend gripping wellness die-hards is tanning their cans, or “perineum sunning,” as influencers are calling it. “In a mere 30 seconds of sunlight on your butthole, you will receive more energy from this electric node than you would in an entire day being outside with your clothes on,” says an influencer, who goes by Ra of Earth. In a viral video that has racked up more than 35,000 views, he gestures toward the sun as three naked men lie down, point their backsides to the sky and make sounds of pleasure.

Comments:

The Pied Piper of social media laughs up his sleeve.

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Reply 1 - Posted by: Lawsy0 11/27/2019 11:50:45 AM (No. 247055)
I prefer a bum wrap when In or out of the sunshine.
6 people like this.

Reply 2 - Posted by: qr4j 11/27/2019 11:51:24 AM (No. 247056)
Is this the same crowd that wanted Hillary to be president and want images of Washington and Lee to be removed from their college diplomas? R I D I C U L O U S ! ! !
21 people like this.

Reply 3 - Posted by: JunkYardDog 11/27/2019 11:54:50 AM (No. 247062)
The Culinaria Society, sticking their business in people's faces. They need to learn to turn the other cheek.
14 people like this.

Reply 4 - Posted by: droopydog 11/27/2019 12:00:47 PM (No. 247070)
And WE are the cult? It's only a matter of time before the National Inquirer obtains celebrity "perineum sunning" photos. God help us.
16 people like this.

Reply 5 - Posted by: bad-hair 11/27/2019 12:10:11 PM (No. 247076)
This thread is going to get really full, really fast with really funny stuff. I can just spot the Democrats out there. They will be the ones Bums Up for freedom. Already LMAO.
13 people like this.

Reply 6 - Posted by: bad-hair 11/27/2019 12:15:42 PM (No. 247078)
Sorry for the double but I'm about to get stinking rich. I have invented a CRYSTAL orifice enhancer which will refract the beneficial rays beyond the surface. I'm thinking $29.95.
22 people like this.

Reply 7 - Posted by: thethirdruffian 11/27/2019 12:24:07 PM (No. 247083)
This is probably the gayest thing I’ve ever read.
18 people like this.

Reply 8 - Posted by: Saryden 11/27/2019 12:26:38 PM (No. 247084)
Brings to mind those pictures of Muslims in the streets with their bums in the air.
18 people like this.

Reply 9 - Posted by: hammondb3 11/27/2019 12:35:54 PM (No. 247094)
Dang it... one of my favorites insults is to say "you can stick it where the sun don't shine". Liberals ruin EVERYTHING.
41 people like this.

Reply 10 - Posted by: Newtsche 11/27/2019 12:41:26 PM (No. 247096)
Taint right, no sir, taint right.
23 people like this.

Reply 11 - Posted by: udanja99 11/27/2019 12:41:45 PM (No. 247097)
So, does this mean that one lies on the beach on one’s stomach and manually spreads one’s naked cheeks? And what about obese people who can’t reach their cheeks?
8 people like this.

Reply 12 - Posted by: ussjimmycarter 11/27/2019 12:56:45 PM (No. 247098)
There are more than a few actors in Hollyweird ready willing and able to cast some serious shade on your fun boys!
7 people like this.

Reply 13 - Posted by: hershey 11/27/2019 1:05:17 PM (No. 247103)
It's just the natural snowflake position of head in the sand, butt in the air....
16 people like this.

Reply 14 - Posted by: EQKimball 11/27/2019 1:18:05 PM (No. 247108)
At last a remedy for liberals having inserted their brains “where the sun don’t shine.”
7 people like this.

Reply 15 - Posted by: DVC 11/27/2019 1:28:23 PM (No. 247125)
What a bunch of ***holes.
13 people like this.

Reply 16 - Posted by: Strike3 11/27/2019 1:31:11 PM (No. 247128)
I'm a big fan of spending as much time in the sun as possible but this is just plain perverted.
5 people like this.

Reply 17 - Posted by: kono 11/27/2019 1:35:17 PM (No. 247132)
LMSPO -- Laughing my shaded perineum off.
12 people like this.

Reply 18 - Posted by: Grounded 11/27/2019 1:39:58 PM (No. 247138)
Is Mayor Pete on board with this? He's pretty active in perineum circles.
16 people like this.

Reply 19 - Posted by: Calamity Kate 11/27/2019 1:42:55 PM (No. 247141)
I'd tell them to stick it where the sun don't shine, but apparently that isn't really an option anymore?
7 people like this.

Reply 20 - Posted by: bamboozle 11/27/2019 2:02:24 PM (No. 247155)
So consider then the awesome pain of a bad sunburn in those regions....Pain that lasts for day?
5 people like this.

Reply 21 - Posted by: MeiDei 11/27/2019 2:09:42 PM (No. 247162)
Beats being on your back and staring at the sun ... let's hope the sun disinfects them! Somehow the effect conjures up a correlation with SJWs and the many remarks one can imagine.
1 person likes this.

Reply 22 - Posted by: Axeman 11/27/2019 2:20:51 PM (No. 247168)
There is no such thing as bad publicity. I know Ra and he may be unconventional but he is not in any way crazy, but his reality is not built the way most people's realities are built. So he's an "influencer"? He'll love that.
1 person likes this.

Reply 23 - Posted by: buckeye1 11/27/2019 2:29:35 PM (No. 247173)
This made me laugh out loud...for real!
5 people like this.

Reply 24 - Posted by: harleynyc 11/27/2019 2:30:20 PM (No. 247174)
what's next ? perineum tanning salons ?
7 people like this.

Reply 25 - Posted by: zephyrgirl 11/27/2019 3:13:23 PM (No. 247205)
It won't be fun when they get skin cancer around their perineum.
6 people like this.

Reply 26 - Posted by: Schnapps 11/27/2019 3:19:27 PM (No. 247207)
When we hear those "sounds of pleasure" around here we usually blame the dog.
13 people like this.

Reply 27 - Posted by: Maggie2u 11/27/2019 3:25:55 PM (No. 247208)
so, they're mooning the sun?
15 people like this.

Reply 28 - Posted by: secondtimelucky 11/27/2019 3:43:18 PM (No. 247212)
FTA: if you live in a place that has heavy winters, when the sun finally comes out, spread your legs and get some sunshine. I've heard it called a lot of things - but "sunshine" is a new one...
5 people like this.

Reply 29 - Posted by: whyyeseyec 11/27/2019 4:09:52 PM (No. 247226)
Gives a whole new meaning to the expression - 'Man, this really fries my a$$'
5 people like this.

Reply 30 - Posted by: Dino Sayer 11/27/2019 4:49:33 PM (No. 247251)
First proposed by Buttoutsky.
2 people like this.

Reply 31 - Posted by: kono 11/27/2019 5:09:42 PM (No. 247260)
Wouldn't a visit to a proctologist give you 30 seconds of light up your butthole? Hm? On a separate (but comparably twisted) train of thought, who will be the first to sue Ra for their getting rectal cancer after sunning where the sun don't shine? To adapt without permission a line from George Carlin (I think), these are the kinds of thoughts that should have kept me out of the really good schools.
1 person likes this.

Reply 32 - Posted by: dirtyjersey 11/27/2019 5:15:43 PM (No. 247262)
Leftists that get too much butt sun are at higher risk of brain cancer.
10 people like this.

Reply 33 - Posted by: varkdriver 11/27/2019 6:33:41 PM (No. 247301)
My question is, do you point yourself towards the sun, or towards Uranus? And isn't that redundant? Great posts one and all. Have me laughing my well-tanned posterior off! Happy Thanksgiving to Miss Lucianne, staff, and yes, even the hard-working Taste Police. Proud to say I have not yet been issued a citation for a moving violation this year [but the year ain't over yet].
3 people like this.

Reply 34 - Posted by: kayworthy 11/27/2019 7:34:31 PM (No. 247325)
I certainly wont be joining them.
1 person likes this.

Reply 35 - Posted by: pinger 11/27/2019 8:25:08 PM (No. 247350)
Envision an alien space vehicle making its first pass along the beach...
1 person likes this.

Reply 36 - Posted by: kiwinews 11/27/2019 8:35:39 PM (No. 247359)
Gives "catching the red eye" a whole new meaning. Preparation H SPF 60 already in production as we type.
6 people like this.

Reply 37 - Posted by: Trigger2 11/28/2019 1:53:52 AM (No. 247473)
Perverts and dumber than a door knob.
0 people like this.

Reply 38 - Posted by: Sunhan65 11/28/2019 6:49:36 AM (No. 247526)
Come on, everyone, sing it with me now! https://youtu.be/oJfRc5rzXdo
0 people like this.

Reply 39 - Posted by: Sunhan65 11/28/2019 7:02:45 AM (No. 247531)
Come on, everyone, sing it with me now! https://youtu.be/oJfRc5rzXdo
0 people like this.

Reply 40 - Posted by: franq 11/28/2019 8:34:57 AM (No. 247625)
I've said it before. I pity kids growing up today.
0 people like this.

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