Beast from the East! Panicking Putin 'calls
up OBESE 280lbs retired general, 67, to
lead forces in Ukraine' after 'most of
his best and battle-hardened senior commanders
are killed' in war
Daily Mail (UK),
by
Walter Finch
Original Article
Posted By: Imright,
6/26/2022 12:28:11 PM
Putin has called an obese general out of retirement to take command of forces in Ukraine after yet another round of purges of top commanders has left him 'scraping the barrel'.
The 20 stone General Pavel, 67, has been summoned from his comfortable life in the Moscow suburbs and told to don his specially-made army fatigues and go to the front lines of eastern Ukraine.
He will now take charge of Russian special forces operating in the region after the unit's former commander was seriously injured in an artillery strike.
A veteran of the Soviet Union's ill-fated invasion of Afghanistan in the 1980s and a member of Russia's special forces,
Reply 1 - Posted by:
padiva 6/26/2022 12:32:42 PM (No. 1197526)
Folks, that is definitely more than 280 lbs. At least 350 lbs.
19 people like this.
Reply 2 - Posted by:
volksford 6/26/2022 12:38:47 PM (No. 1197534)
If this porker is 280 lbs I am a Olympic athlete
13 people like this.
Reply 3 - Posted by:
Quigley 6/26/2022 12:46:09 PM (No. 1197540)
Definitely the MOAG. He can give the Ukraine columns the old Curley belly bounce.
Probably Russian disinformation. We have to rebuild Russia after we bring down Putin, so cancel your vacation plans and save your money.
4 people like this.
It looks like he's already ingested Crimea.
20 people like this.
Reply 5 - Posted by:
Subsuburban 6/26/2022 12:52:08 PM (No. 1197549)
Believe nothing you see, hear or read about the conflict in Ukraine. Nobody involved has any reason to tell the truth; they have learned the lesson of western politics: It's all about the narrative. Just make it up, repeat it and look shocked when that random little boy looks, points and says, "The Emperor has no clothes!"
17 people like this.
Reply 6 - Posted by:
Mushroom 6/26/2022 12:53:59 PM (No. 1197551)
As a gravitationally gifted individual I can assure you he is not 280lbs.
However, that has nothing to do with his military thought process. It will provide a laugh or two from the front line guys, but who knows what his leadership skills might be? How would you feel being yanked out of retirement like that?
9 people like this.
Reply 7 - Posted by:
stablemoney 6/26/2022 1:02:58 PM (No. 1197567)
More capable than Biden, or any of the woke EU.
8 people like this.
Reply 8 - Posted by:
Hermit_Crab 6/26/2022 1:06:15 PM (No. 1197573)
And yet the Daily Mail WORSHIPS the comparably sized 'Lizzo'. and never would dare to call her even chubby, much less 'obese' as they emphasize here.
9 people like this.
Reply 9 - Posted by:
jntsrgn 6/26/2022 1:07:42 PM (No. 1197578)
This story like most coming out of Ukraine is pure fantasy. Commanders are never killed in battle let alone all of them.
10 people like this.
Reply 10 - Posted by:
Luandir 6/26/2022 1:13:02 PM (No. 1197583)
One gravity bomb should fetch him.
2 people like this.
Reply 11 - Posted by:
Maggie2u 6/26/2022 1:26:46 PM (No. 1197603)
Well, he could be 280lbs. if he's 4'5"...right?
4 people like this.
Reply 12 - Posted by:
varkdriver 6/26/2022 1:38:02 PM (No. 1197614)
There are a number of things I want to say about General Goodyear, but as I am often reminded, this is a SALON, not a SALOON. So I will wander down to my local saloon and comment there!
Still surprises me that so many Russian generals are killed in action. Apparently they are required to be at the very forward edge of the battle area, not back in some Operations Center directing the fight from afar. Wonder if we will ever get any true casualty figures from either side.
4 people like this.
Reply 13 - Posted by:
red1066 6/26/2022 1:49:52 PM (No. 1197630)
Battle hardened? Who have these battle hardened generals been fighting, and this guy just makes for a larger target. He won't need any body armor. I'm not quite sure even armor piercing ammo can penetrate that much fat.
2 people like this.
Reply 14 - Posted by:
Ashley Brenton 6/26/2022 1:50:24 PM (No. 1197631)
Given what we've seen of Russia's logistics, he'll be shedding those pounds in no time!
1 person likes this.
Reply 15 - Posted by:
Bogasso 6/26/2022 2:01:35 PM (No. 1197645)
This brings to mind the time they blew a beached whale carcass up on the Oregon coast back in the 1970s. They used way too big of a charge, and the result was an awful mess.
3 people like this.
Reply 16 - Posted by:
Rumblehog 6/26/2022 2:08:05 PM (No. 1197649)
"General Pavel will eat his way to Kiev by the most circuitous route possible."
/s
3 people like this.
Reply 17 - Posted by:
Noj15 6/26/2022 2:10:04 PM (No. 1197651)
Ukraine has evacuated some of their cities to the Russians. The Russians are going to win this, with or without US support. Everything you hear about Russia's defeat is a lie. Everything.
12 people like this.
Reply 18 - Posted by:
Ida Lou Pino 6/26/2022 2:25:21 PM (No. 1197658)
Ummm -- do you think he'd fit into a pregnancy flight suit?
Our military has plenty of them.
2 people like this.
Reply 19 - Posted by:
Mofongo 6/26/2022 2:33:54 PM (No. 1197667)
Have you looked at our Defense Secretary and Chairman of Joint Chiefs lately? Everything about this story is bogus. Eastern Ukraine is gone.
7 people like this.
Reply 20 - Posted by:
Kate318 6/26/2022 2:49:20 PM (No. 1197676)
It’s amazing to me that the DM gets these inside scoops that no one else seems to publish. What a stellar publication!
3 people like this.
Reply 21 - Posted by:
Annie Xango 6/26/2022 2:54:03 PM (No. 1197680)
#1 spot on 350 at a minimum....
2 people like this.
Reply 22 - Posted by:
rushie 6/26/2022 3:12:13 PM (No. 1197693)
Ya never know…Sounds like the old one eyed general in War and Peace. He was pretty good.
1 person likes this.
Reply 23 - Posted by:
john56 6/26/2022 3:46:58 PM (No. 1197720)
Sounds like an easy target for the Ukrainian snipers.
3 people like this.
Reply 24 - Posted by:
Omen55 6/26/2022 3:59:39 PM (No. 1197725)
If they round him downhill he could wipe out the army of Ukraine.
2 people like this.
Reply 25 - Posted by:
Rama41 6/26/2022 6:07:05 PM (No. 1197809)
From 2500 quiet troops in Afghanistan to this. Thanks to Biden and a woke, politicized military.
2 people like this.
Reply 26 - Posted by:
kennedylaw 6/26/2022 6:23:25 PM (No. 1197840)
I weigh 280 pounds and don't look anything like that porker. OTOH, I am over 6' tall. If he is 5'6" he may only weigh 280.
1 person likes this.
Reply 27 - Posted by:
Tet Vet 68 6/26/2022 7:31:20 PM (No. 1197892)
Well his fat would stop a bullet without affecting any vital organs. The amount of Vodka he drinks would ensure that he feels no pain. And his military prowess is reflected in the loss they had in Afghanistan. We have our own tubby four star Miley who also lost in Afghanistan--maybe it's the water?
3 people like this.
Oh. There's a war in Ukraine and Russia? I hardly knew. It's off all front pages and news. A big fat slug is now running the show. Whodathought? Guess the war is very uninteresting.
1 person likes this.
Reply 29 - Posted by:
lakerman1 6/26/2022 8:52:45 PM (No. 1197978)
Austin and Milley could trade uniforms with him.
2 people like this.
Reply 30 - Posted by:
Blue Hen1 6/26/2022 9:05:53 PM (No. 1197982)
A rare pic of him out of the chow hall
1 person likes this.
Reply 31 - Posted by:
DVC 6/27/2022 11:59:02 AM (No. 1198506)
The Ukrainians have been targeting Russian general officers very successfully. And it helps the Ukrainians that the Russian forces are not 'pro-active' and need a general officer or at least a colonel doing jobs that captains and majors do in the US Army. Russian command structure is VERY top-down, and folks in the middle know to never take any initiative. Not sure about orders? Something changed? Sit down and wait for a colonel or general to tell you what to do. Do the wrong thing on your 'own initiative' and you'll get into trouble. Sit and wait for orders....always safe in the Russian army.
1 person likes this.
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