The Monday Buzz: At some point this week we will all be up to our ears in the Florida election again. The Big Big Big, Final Final Final, Granddaddy Report Of Them All on the whole grim month of November 2000 is due out shortly sponsored by our most powerful media outlets. Newsweek gets this ball rolling with excerpts from Newsweek writer David Kaplan's upcoming book that says that Justice Kennedy picked the next President.....or was it Justice Souter? No, no wait....we thought Katherine Harris did that....or was it Monica Lewinsky? We are so confused.

Cuomo Kid in Deep Lasagna: Andy Cuomo, son of former New York Governor Mario, is about to win second prize as the Clinton cabinet officer to make the biggest mess. (Reno is the all time winner, of course.) Young Cuomo has one of two defenses. Either he was too dumb to know what was going on or too corrupt to stop it. This should be interesting.

Brace Yourself, Bridget: That old punch line might be good advice to Chelsea Clinton who is about to be declared fair game by the British press as she departs for studies at Oxford. Not that we think her goody-two-shoes persona is going to be a very interesting tabloid fodder but after the jerking around the Bush girls have taken it will at least be a bit of payback.

Wassa Matter? Lizard Got Your Toe? Here's your Condit tidbit for the day. Seems Phil Bronstein, Executive Editor at the San Francisco Chronicle pitched the unlucky congressman for an interview pointing to the fact that his paper had and would continue to make nice-nice regarding Condit's keeping his job.

Hazel Nut Hughie & The News: This week probers plan to take a look at Hugh Rodham's "curious" client, pill pusher Glenn Braswell, and his "curious" product, if not his "curious" pardon. We still don't know if Hillary's brother ever gave back the fee he charged Braswell and it looks like we never will.

We Know Who We Are: New stats on who uses the Internet are out and it's us. With all the whining (see Maureen Dowd yesterday) about Mega-Mono-Media, the big players are forgetting that the alternative press is right here on the web and the age group that has been screwed most severely by big media controls it. Let's keep that our little secret, okay? Not only do we know who we are, we know where to go for news.

-Your Untanned, Rested and Ready LComStaff