Tuesday, July 16, 2002

Front Burner Follies: Yesterday Coca Cola announced it was going to do some upfront book cooking and now the Washington Post has joined the scramble. We guess this is legit but it sure looks like a sly game of Hide- in- Plain -Sight. Let's see how this is received and if this will help them avoid seeing their female staffer in Playboy.

State of Flux No Yucks: MSNBC debuts their new summer lineup yesterday with a recycled and over haberdashed Bill Press and Pat Buchanan squinting at the monitors and flubbing hard breaks like a couple of sophomores instead of the seasoned talking heads they are. One word for the sound of this two hour outing is "drone." Don't give up your nap. Then there was Jerry Nachman, media renaissance man in his four hundred and twentieth new job on a faux Front Page set, telling guest Don Imus he was hurt by Imus' cutting remarks about him on air and that the Nachmans are now divorced. Then came (drum roll) Phil Donahue, the retreads' retread with first guest, the appalling Iraq appeaser, Scott Ritter. Here's a story saying Microsoft may have had it with America's News Network. Small wonder.

Lindt Upside: Taliban Johnny now has 17 years to study the Koran and rethink his youthful quest for enlightenment. The best part of his plea yesterday was that it saved us a trial in which we would have to listen to his father compare him to Nelson Mandela some more and his mother keening about what a sweet baby he was.

The Thing That Wouldn't Leave: Here's a report that Algore is headed for a fund raiser in Utah. Utah in July? This has to mean he wants to run again which leaves us torn. He would lose pathetically but then again are we strong enough for a campaign by a man who has surely said all he has to say. Anyone remember Harold Stassen?

And, The Winner Is: Every year we wait nervously to see if the winner of Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest for horrible writing award will in any way approximate with our efforts. Rephah Berg of Oakland is this year's honoree. We particularly liked learning that she writes those sayings you read on lapel buttons. Don't let anyone tell you there isn't work out there.

-Your Summer-Weary-With-Weeks-To-Go-LComStaff