Oh, Well: For those of you still grumbling over "The Torch" Torricelli beating the rap, here is a New York Times backgrounder on how it all happened. On Imus this morning the Senator said he didn't take any "illegal" gifts and that The New York Times told lies about him. He said David Chang, his accuser is a convicted felon. The lesson here is that when caught, parse your words Clinton-style and only take gifts and cash from someone who is skeazier than you are.

Keeping Hope Alive: To make up for the Torricelli disappointment, here's cheering news. The departing U.S. Attorney Mary Jo White has left you a present. Seems the investigation of two of Clinton's smellier pardons has been moved to the front burner. Her former office will be looking into the Marc Rich scam and Hillary's infamous "pardons for dough" charges. Spring may truly get here.

Save My Shoes! They're Jimmy Choos! Poor Paula Zahn. All that long legs, za-za clothes, shiny lips and big buttery chunks of hair presentation that went over so well at Fox has gotten her called merely "a little bit sexy" by CNN's promo department and the ad has angered the front office. Seems she wants to be thought of as smart. Read the Fox send up of the whole situation and say this for Fox. They have fun.

A-Team, Yea Team! The London Telegraph has one terrific story on some very special Green Beret behavior in Afghanistan. Read it and give thanks that we still produce men like these.

Too Much Help From His Friends? Historian Stephen Ambrose can't catch a break. No sooner has he apologized for overuse of someone else's work then Forbes finds some more lifted lines in his book on Custer. Could it be that someone who churns out so much work has to rely on others to get the job done? One of publishing dirty little secrets is that it happens all the time.

Keyes' Kingdom: Finally, some TV suits have seen the light and given the brilliant Dr. Alan Keyes a nice big 10:00 p.m. spot. MSNBC is lucky. They can just drop Keyes into place opposite Fox's new "get" Greta Van Susteren, no serious intellectual or cosmetic repaving will be required.

-Your Repaving Resistant LComStaff